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Buthe recognized some other features, too. He looked back at the road."What's your mom's name?" he asked."B-barbie." Kelly hiccuped in the middle of the name.Phil smiled with just the corners of his mouth. "You look a lot likeyour mom."Kelly blinked. "You know my mom?" Yes," he said. "I did, years ago. But I never knew about you?" Um." Kelly tried to think. This strange man was scary, obviouslycrazy. He says he won't hurt me but how do I know that? I can't trusthim. "-hic- We could go to South Coast Plaza? The Mall?"Phil frowned. "Where the heck is that? I haven't been in OC in morethan ten years? I use to live in Riverside." It's, um, at the 405 and Bristol?"Phil looked at one of the freeway signs. "Bristol coming up. Right, Ithink I went there once." He took the exit ramp carefully; driving wasa skill he hadn't used much lately and he didn't want to make anymistakes."Le-hic-eft," said Kelly. The hiccups were beginning to hurt; this wasthe third case today, maybe the fourth. He. They work great but they don’t come cheap. It’s roughly $1000 an inch.”The man perks up.“So,” the doctor says, “You must decide how many inches you want. But I understand that you have been married for over thirty years, and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now, she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before, and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It’s important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision.”The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.The doctor comes back the next day, “So, have you spoken with your wife?”“Yes I have,” says the man.“And has she helped you make a decision?”“Yes,” says the man.“What is your decision?” asks the doctor.“We’re getting granite countertops.”The Italian Gardner-Spring will be here before you know itAn elderly Italian gentleman lived alone in New Jersey. He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was.
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